Real Madrid vs FC Barcelona: A Tongue-in-Cheek look at El Clasico

Good times...

Just for fun...

Time to embarrass everyone who still has some affection for Madrid. I'm dying for a three goal margin victory for us. I want Mourinho sacked/resigned/whatever, not because he makes Madrid different, but so people can stop talking about him like a football god. With what the guy has been allowed by Madridistas to do, I pity Fabio Capello and Manuel Pellegrini for the efforts and respect they had for the historical club. Here are my messages to a few of the players and club representatives...

My message to Puyol and Alves: Please do not allow Ronnie boy a shot on goal; I want his fans to murder him (figuratively) after this encounter.

To Ramos: Keep your hands behind your back and watch The Flea fly.

To Pepe and Marcelo: Remember that red card please, don't you dare disappoint the Cules.

To Fabregas: Please keep on scoring, we Cules don't stand the thought of you growing any more hair, it's disgusting. There is only one Puyol!!!

To Saint Iker: Please let goals in, I want to see you do The Casillas Face
Casillas-soccer-face-e1310600452511_medium

via media.egotvonline.com


To Xabi Mr Alonso: You cost me a serious bet the other day, I want that yellow card on the 30th minute tonight!!! Ok?

To The Merengues: Please don't hesitate to Boo your team, we Cules love discussing that stuff. Am I right @Indermethil?

To our players: Win a penalty and let Pinto take it, Maybe Tim H. can stop bragging. Lol, sh**ty EPL defending ;-)

Quotes of the week from The Fictional Spanish Paper (TFSP express):

Mourinho: "Yes! Yes! Yes! Hey come here Karanka, I just figured out Pep's team, I'm going to have a man to man-mark their keeper. Don't worry my friend; they'll be the one's poking our eyes this time! Yay!"

Di Stefano: "Eish, I should get myself one of those Barcelona membership cards, these Ronaldos and Mourinhos of the world are making me embarrassed to be a Madridsta. I should probably start by calling Cruyff..."

Pep Guardiola: "4-3-3 or 3-4-3? Ah F**k it, I've done it all, tonight I'm attacking with Puyol, Pique and Mascherano. My boys Messi, Alexis and Cuenca will practice tackling during the pre-match warm up. Let's see whose name people will remember in a 100 years’ time, I'm pretty sure it won't be Cruyff's..."

Marca to AS: "Hey AS, I'm starting to think we are on the wrong side here, can you ask Di Stefano about that ticket to Barcelona?"

Reporter to Ronaldo: "So what's your prediction for tonight Ronnie?"

Ronaldo: "We'll win by the 5 goals I'll score in extra time, (after taking 5 seconds to think) F**k!!!! That's just wrong isn't?"

Follow Barca Blaugranes on your preferred social network:


Follow me on:

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join Barca Blaugranes

You must be a member of Barca Blaugranes to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Barca Blaugranes. You should read them.

Join Barca Blaugranes

You must be a member of Barca Blaugranes to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Barca Blaugranes. You should read them.

Spinner.vc97ec6e

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9353_tracker